a lot of thoughts..5:18 AM
Jan 3, 2010
just finished watching a k-drama.
east of eden.
brilliant show, kept me and my sis watching till the end.
after every drama i watch, i hate to reach the last episode.
every drama is like a journey.
i feel as if i'm in that journey with the characters inside.
maybe its just the selfish me.
but i dun wan the good things in life to end.
ever.
end of the show got me very touched.
and sent my mind into overdrive with countless thoughts.
main character, lee dong chul.
portrayed by song seung hun.
wish i could be like him.
stay true to his own principles.
love like a true man.
but well.
it sux comparing oneself to a character in a drama.
lols.
most of the time i wonder wad love is.
is it just a strong feeling of attraction for the opposite gender.
or is it a sense of duty to another person that one must fulfil.
a lot of pple in this world treats love like sth worthless.
just bcos of some incidents and misunderstadings and quarrels.
break up just like that.
i'm a strong believer in true love.
no matter i meet how many setbacks.
i still believe that there is someone out there.
that i can give my all for.
that she can give her all for me.
and we'll live happily ever after.
girls which i have a liking for.
they are just like passing clouds.
some are slow, some are fast.
yet none of them stayed with me thruout.
maybe its just my luck.
maybe its just my fate.
maybe.
its just my destiny.
i have no idea at all.
but one day.
one fine day.
i hope that the right gal will appear in my life.
and i would not have lived in vain.
every one of us has their own unique way.
some special way to forget.
to erase memories from their brain.
to forget.
something.
someone.
somewhere.
some incident.
i really wish i can forget some things.
and my way.
is to replay those memories i have.
in my mind.
recall all those times.
when i gave my everything.
just to give others happiness.
to reduce their burden.
to make their lives comfortable.
to let them feel less stressful.
to give them company.
although my company is not that fantastic.
my mind has been replaying some memories.
i'm trying so hard to forget.
i shouldnt have done the things i did.
i shouldnt have said the things i said.
and yet i did all of them.
just bcos.
i thot i was in love with u.
but seeing the way that u r forgetting me now.
makes my heart die faster every second.
i am seeing my true worth to u now.
i never knew that i was such a worthless person in ur life.
u told me i was important to u.
and i really believed it.
trust me.
i really believed it with all my heart.
but with every action u do.
with every word u say.
i lost my hope bit by bit.
ounce by ounce.
i began to have doubts.
i doubted myself.
i laughed at myself.
i cried for myself.
why was i so stupid.
maybe i just have this weird habit of falling for gals i dun deserve to.
or falling for gals that just are not meant for me.
its my fault.
i shouldnt blame u.
its all my fault.
be happy.
dun worry.
after this experience.
i'll try to get rid of the need for others' care and concern.
i thot i could trust u with everything.
but now.
the cruel fact is.
i can only trust myself.
what a sad life.
